When she was hanging from a cliff,
I threw some nearby rope.
But the bristles ruined her manicure
And her pinky still can't grope.

She sez
"I'm not happy.
I can't stand a thing.
I'm not happy.
Why's that bluebird have to sing?"

"I'm not happy.
Why can't everybody see?
I'm not happy.
Hey world, what about me?"

Hit it big in Vegas,
So I gave her half the cash.
But the lucre wasn't crisp enuff
And why should she pay tax?

Collection agents on the phone,
Can't work a toilet seat.
I've learned that one man's fiancée is another's catastrophe.

She sez
"I'm not happy.
Stop or I'll have a fit.
I'm not happy.
Why won't any man commit?"

I'm not happy.
She aint keen on clarity.
I'm not happy.
Put you outta my misery.

Maybe it's the time to boot yer bottom out of view?
Return you to the pathetic chatlines of lonely heart galoots?

I said
I'm not happy.
Too much misterogyny.
I'm not happy.
She's choking on penis envy.

I'm not happy with her grody new hideous tat.
I'm not happy with her heaving rolls of fat.